“We have to see the chimp playing hockey! That’s hilarious! Ice is so slippery! And monkeys are all irrational… we have to see this!”

Andrew: “We will defend it with our very lives.”

Anya: “Yes, we will defend it with his very life.”

Tara: “Sex poodle?”

Anya: “Yeah, why?”

Tara: “Uh, I’m not sure you should say ‘sex poodle’ in your vows.”

Anya: “Huh.”

“Or maybe midgets”
“Clearly our number is a retro-pastiche that’s never going to be a break-away pop hit.”
“Oh, wouldn’t it be tragic if you were here being kind of silly with your comically paralyzed sister while Willow was dying?”

Willow: “Hey, respect the narrative flow much?”

Anya: “Please, continue the story of failure.”

“And she’ll never have eggs, or yawn or brush her hair, not ever and no one will explain to me why.”

Willow: “This isn’t about his physical presence! It’s about his heart.”

Anya: “His physical presence has a penis!”

Willow: “I can work around it!”